Marriage was held in very high esteem in my home growing up. I am fortunate to come from a line of people who have remained faithful to their marriage vows over their lives, and consequently from a young age, my parents began talking about the man I would marry.
My young, hopelessly romantic, and enthusiastically Christian self, set out to pray for my husband on a daily basis. At thirteen, I would walk around my neighborhood praying for his well-being, protection, and salvation, and that God would bring us together when the time was right.
This prayer time helped keep a more healthy perspective when it came to romantic relationships. Even at the young age of thirteen, I knew that dating wasn’t so much about me having fun (even though it was) but giving my heart to someone else was a big, holy affair.
Jesus was in the mix for my every high school crush and he protected me from my more rash, desperate-for-attention teenage self.
2. Approach Your Dating Life as a Holy Affair
At a young age, I determined that I would not date anyone for more than a year without feeling strongly that I could spend my life with them. God placed it on my heart not to “waste time” with anyone that I wasn’t willing to spend a lifetime with.
This was just the standard I set for myself, and it is not a formula for success, but the idea that every dating relationship matters is key to being ready for big-time commitment.
Seeing people as things you can use for fun, enjoyment, pleasure, flings, or a place to “sow wild oats” sets a dangerous precedent for how you see those you romantically invest in.
Dating is a holy affair; it’s the place we practice married life.
Treating the people you are willing to allow into your bedroom or heart as commodities really undermines your ability to treat every person as those “fearfully made” by God. It also is easy to see our future spouses as dispensable when we have taken up the practice as seeing others as ways to bring ourselves joy, rather than ones we are made to serve.
The foundation of a strong marriage is mutual service and a willingness to sacrificially love one another.
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